I wasn't sure if i was going to post this here. Cos i hate to seem like the whiney, looking-for-sympathy type. But since it's something that i can't squeeze out of my mind i decided that i will post it here. I've described it in quite alot of detail, so no worries if you can't be arsed to read it lol.
So.. .. .. Glastonbury didn't get off to such a fantastic start for me. I went there with my best mate (at the time) Josh, which seemed like a fantastic idea.
We were sharing a tent & camped in the Green Police Staff field. I was knackerd after so much traveling & decided to go to bed at about 7pm (this was the Tuesday night, so no festival stuff was happening). Josh came in at like 10pm cos i remember checking my phone to see how late it was.
Then, at about 1am I woke up. He started tapping on the ground sheet of the tent, being just waking up I didn't think owt of it cos, well, you just don't. Then, i felt him pull back my sleeping bag & start sliding his hand down it!
Luckily i had my back to him & he got about a 1/3 the way down my back before i asked him what the fuck he was doing. Then he snatched his hand back & rolled over. He didn't know i was awake.
I checked my phone & it was 1:20am. I laid there thinking about what the fuck had just gone on when i realised just how fucked up it was! So i sat up & put my coat on, he asked what i was doing so i lied & said I was going for a piss. Instead i went & sat with some random people who i was going to be working with.
Then when they went to bed at like 2:30am I didn't want to go back to the tent, so went for a walk around Glastonbury site. I rang Kane & told him what had happened, obviously he was fuming. Then I walked til about 5am. Was pretty cool to see the site being so empty.
Then when i got back to camping site there was obviously no-one awake, so i went in the communal tent & slept til 8:30am when i went for another walk. Then he started ringing & texting me asking where i was so i decided to go back & confront him.
He wasn't there when i got in, so i took the opportunity to catch up o n some sleep. He came in at sometime like 11am, so i shot up & jumped out of the tent.
He was like "what's wrong with you?" so i asked him for my return tickets home (he was keeping hold of them), i didn't tell him why just shouted til he gave me them. Then i told him i wanted him out of my tent, he kept asking why so i told him i felt him putting his hand down my sleeping bag.
To this he said "what, do you mean when i was climbing over you to get to bed?" Now i knew he came in at 10pm. After plenty of shouting, swearing & carrying on i whacked him round the face with his muddy wellies & told him to get the fuck out of my sight.
I felt i now needed to apologize to my 'neighbours' for all the carry on & explain what had gone on. One of the girls told me i should tell Bernadette (our team leader) so i took her advice.
After telling Bernadette he tried coming back up to me saying it must be a misunderstanding & all that, but i made sure he knew that i wasn't letting my guard down.
So.... The team leaders decided they had to log this incident down & 'interviewed' him before me. Then when it came to interviewing me they tried their best to convince me how sincere he was that it must have been a misunderstanding. This fucked me off alot cos i know 100% it wasn't.
After all that i was ready to go home i was that pissed off, but after putting things in perspective i wasn't going to let him ruin it for me. Which i'm glad i didn't cos i had an awesome time. Infact, it was probably better than if i was still had been talking to him lol.
Now, i'm not the kind of girl to make something like this up, nor has anything of the sort ever happened to me before. Yes, i've never been keen on blokes, but i'd never do such a cunty thing without reason.
Plus, i went over & over & over the story so many times & i can't see any possible way he didn't do it.
Well, that's my story, it's quite nice to get it all written down & off my chest. It's been over a month now & i still can't get it off my mind. Not because i feel abused or anything but cos it makes me feel sick if it'd have been another girl. Maybe a girl who wouldn't stick up for herself.
Or what if it happens again to someone else, someone weaker than me. What if he does worse. Surely people who are willing to try grope their best friends when they're sleeping are willing to do other such stuff?
God it makes me so fucking angry. I'd still so much love to go round to his house & rip his fucking balls off & give them to his mum. I still regret not kicking the shit out of him then & there. But i am left feeling very betrayed & slightly lonely.
Plus any trust i had for men has lessened greatly, they always seem to prove themselves to be the same. Even as a young baby i had an irrational fear of men, now it may seem with good reason. Obviously i will exempt Kane & my Grandad from this rule lol.